this selfish, spiteful , hateful drama queen that i call my wife
This woman has the ability to make any situation worse. If nothing is going wrong, she can make something wrong. If everything is falling into place, this bitch can knock something out. I have never seen a situation that couldn’t be worsened somehow by simply adding her to the mix. She is so jealous of every other relationship I have with family or friends and is insecure to a fault. If she could get her crap straight then she may not have to stay on my ass all the time. Its not my fault your family isn’t worth anything and you were an idiot when you were younger and it cost you the things in life that you wanted. You made the bed, now lie in it. I have no sympathy for you. You just get some type of enjoyment from making miserable. At one time we got along great, i guess things changed and I grew up into a responsible adult , and you just stayed an insecure little drama queen playing the role of Im so pitiful and everyone owes me something. Well guess, what Im over it, im over you, what love I did have is fading fast, I don’t know if we even have any chance anymore…
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Wow. That sounds really sad. From what you mentioned, that relly does sound like she’s fighting with her insecurities. You guys should have some kind of marriage counseling. Dont give up!!
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how can you tell him not to give up? he already has. the only thing he has left to do now is to tell her that he has given up and it’s over. the only thing that counseling could accomplish at this point is delaying the inevitable.
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He cares enough to vent about it. I think there still could be something there…
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Ok, so he vented about it on an anonymous web site….. that tells you he cares and there could still be a chance…? Did you even read what he wrote? The last line of his vent tells me he is done and all that’s left is to tell his wife.
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Yes, I did read what he wrote. And yes, I do think that when a person vents about something they care enough to vent about it in hopes of some feedback/advice on what they can do to change the situation for the better. So yes, I think there still could be hope. And whats wrong with saying something encouraging anyway? It sounds like he misses the old her…and somewhere in the fog of all this I bet shes still there.
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point well put 1234. i didn’t get the impression that he was hoping or looking for advice, it seemed to me it was more of a statement about his wife and the way she is.
from experience i’ll say this: my exwife changed a lot from the time i met her to the time we got divorced. we tried counseling. during counseling, my biggest bitch was that she did little to nothing around the house. i gave examples of what i did. i asked her to give me examples of what she did. she would quickly change the subject to something else that we would usually fight about and never answer my questions. having never mowed a lawn IN HER LIFE, she would tell me i was doing it wrong. having never picked up dog shit IN HER LIFE, she would point to the ones i missed. having never done a lot of things in her life, she would point out to me how i was doing them wrong. she grew up having a father that did most everything around the house and that is what she expected from me. unfortunately for me, i didn’t realize what kind of spoiled little bitch she was until we went to counseling and it all became clear to me.
so i guess you could say that counseling was just the thing i needed to finally say i wanted out of the marriage.
we have been divorced for 6 years now and, obviously, i still hold some bitterness.
sometimes, it is just best to cut your ties with someone, as much as it may suck to do so. i don’t regret my marriage. at times, i do regret that we couldn’t have worked things out, but hopefully we both grew and learned from our time spent together.
somebody said something in another post here that some people come into your life and you are only meant to know them for a small amount of time and others come into your life and are there till the end.
in closing i will say this: i hope he can communicate with his wife and she can see how he feels. i hope they can get back to a happy place (especially if there are kids involved). but i never assume certain things will happen, i can only hope they do.
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To the OP, whichever path you decide to take, I hope it leads to happiness for you. That is what is important here.
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I am in the same boat as the poster.
The outlook is grim…
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I hope you do not have kids and I would advise you to get out before you do have any.
I moved with my wife to her country of birth when her father got cancer. I was working in a city over an hour away so I could not really meet up with people from wotk socially. When her father took a turn for the worse I decided to stay at home for a while and raise our baby daughter as my wife was in her final year of university. Ofcourse she met alot of people at the university and already had a large group of friends in the city from her youth. She then complained about her stress with studying and her dad and that she needs some time with her friends which meant that I got stuck at home every weekend to babysit while being completely excluded from her social life. I thought that this was okay and that we could move away and start fresh after her exams and her father either dying or getting healthy again.
She then went on to have an affair with at least one of the friends and she blames me because our relationship is unbalanced and that I never integrated in her country or managed to build up much of a social life for myself over here. Now I am stuck in a country that I do not want to be in just to stay close to my daughter.
Some people are just completely selfish and hartless and you just have to take a lesson from that and do what is right for you before things get more complicated.
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Yah, I was in the same boat as the poster. I married a girl who was completely selfish. I loved the family as they were the most caring kind hearted people in the world. But this bitch had tried to tear her family apart. A couple years ago she got a refund from her college tuition and ran away to another country with the money.
Well, she was beutiful and smart, and I fell in love with her. But seven months after the marriage, every once of love I had was dead. The above person is taking the words out of my mouth. If nothing was wrong, she would try to make hell. I later read that if a person can’t control their lives they NEED to control others. Seven months after the marriage I was so happy to be out. I wanted to live again, I started eating and being healthy again. No more smoking with the ex (she would not quit smoking, and hid it from her parents). OH my god man, life can be so good without a woman. Oh side note – we had no kids, so it was an easy out. I completely sympathise for anyone with a kid.
My brother said a great thing to me “women are a lot of fun, but they aren’t necassary”. In closing, Live for yourself, and have a happy life. If you find a woman, make sure she just makes your life better. Because really, we don’t NEED to take crap
Hope you moved on sir.
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I know the pain hang in there!
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Bad.
Am in the same situation myself. She cut me almost completely off sex after 1 year (and Im still here 12 years later). At the same time, she also cut me off friends and family. She spouted so much hate at my family that they minimized their contact with me — my parents are afraid that if they intrude more into my life, she will divorce me and being of the impression that we’re otherwise very happy, they don’t want that to happen. In the meantime, she spent all her earnings, and some of mine, in buying her family a large house, and saves all her money in a joint account with her sister. And yeah, she’s had a couple of affairs with others including an ex friend, and has forced other friends out of my life because they wouldn’t respond to her.
Somehow, I cant get myself to up and leave, because somewhere inside I remember the good times — before we were married. She was my first love (although I found later she was cheating on me with various people in all those years too) and for some reason I cant picture myself with another woman.
Get out of there bud. I cant do it, but you should.
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hey
i have tried everything myself and i know that i am not a bad person, but my wife says that i am the worst man she has ever had in her life.everything has to be about her,all eyes has to be own her,whenever i don’t want to do what she wants me to do then there endless drama, my will put words into my mouth of what i am thinking and then draw conclusions of things that i was never even thinking, she has left me three times,, finally she got her own place through the county then she wanted me to move in to work on our marriage but it only turned out to be the same thing once again, just wanting me there to pay all the bills why she sleeps until on oclock in the afternoon, she does not work nor does she go to school but she wants everything her way or there is endless drama on why she should get her way and i’m not a good man, she says things like i am the worst man she has ever had, and it goes on and on. people on her father’s side of her family all works, however on her mother’s side no one works they all draw ssi and public assistance, even the men..when i met my wife she said over and over again that she did not want that but that has yet to be proven…so i do understand what this person is saying very much.
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